If you pick up a dictionary, the definition you’ll find for the word ‘feminism’. In simple terms, there shouldn’t be any injustice met out to either sex. They should be treated equally. But, off late, a new type of feminism is developing which is rightly called as pseudo feminism. Pseudo feminists hold a strong resolve to correct all the injustices done to women, mostly by lashing out at men and demeaning them. What they forget is the basic essence of feminism movement: equality. Another form of pseudo feminism, according to me, is the feminism of convenience. The biggest example being: men paying for dates. If we’re as equal as women proclaim to be, why can’t a restaurant bill be split between the two? The reason is simple-men are too egoistic to let a woman pay, and for a few women it miraculously becomes a man’s job to pay for the date. Where, I ask these feminists, does the feminism vanish then?
Feminism is now a muddied term. Difficult to say what it means today. We often don’t realise it, but pseudo feminism is all around us, hiding behind feminism in clandestine. We’re the women shouting for equal rights everywhere, but don’t waste a single minute asking a guy sitting on a Ladies Reserved seat to vacate it. Why do we need reservations in general coaches? Since we’re able bodied, strong, grown-up women of strength, can’t we stand in a general coach? Men doing 9-5 jobs, burning their hours toiling hard to earn, are as tired as we are. It is just a very preposterous notion. Like it’s correctly said, two wrongs don’t make a right.
Although they are in the minority, it’s a crystal clear truth there are men who too are subjected to sexual crimes. The numbers of cases reported to the police are on the lower side, because most of the men don’t report such crime for the fear of being ridiculed at, not being believed and instead facing the charges themselves. Men are mostly kidnapped and abducted for illegal sexual intercourse, forced marriages, prostitution, etc. The number of such victims is really low but it’s a fact we cannot ignore. When we are talking of rising violence against women, we shouldn’t neglect the fact that somewhere out there are men also being subjected to same brutalities.
Board results are a few months away, but a boy has passed with flying colors by refusing to be part of a plan to rape a girl, hatched by the girl herself, who was pretending to be a boy. The boy passed but, many say, feminism failed. They have been saying that for years now. They are not too off the mark though. While it may not have failed, it sure has taken a huge hit.
Fake accounts, false allegations and fraudulent charges have harmed men and their reputations. They are also building a case against women’s right to stay in the fight for justice.
Part of the problem is the fact that the odds are heavily stacked against women. But another part of the problem is the way women used social media to fight this battle.
Each true story helps build credibility. Each false story is turned into a weapon against the fight for gender justice. The girl, who faked herself as a boy, is not part of the Bois Locker Room chats, but the story is now all about this one girl who faked her identity.
So what should women do?
I will answer with what they should not.
One, do not shoot and scoot. Don’t get into it if you cannot stay in it. Weigh in before you jump in. This is for the long haul. There is a lot of mudslinging that happens. You can’t escape the splashes.
Two, do not use fake accounts to bring down men. It’s easy to prove. The consequences are for everyone – the man, the movement and also you. Take care of You. Take care of the fight that is for us to stand equal to men with no biases in workplaces, no casual sexism, no acid attacks, no rapes and no honor killings.
If true feminism was followed, then we would treat all the victims equally. Victims would cease to be women or men, but just victims of abuse. But sadly, that is not the case. Pseudo feminism shouts out loudly that men can’t be raped, men can’t be tormented, and men claiming to have been put under such atrocities are lying cheats. It’s most likely that I would be branded ‘anti-feminist’ by pseudo feminists all around, but I don’t mind. I don’t mind because I know how to stand up for my fellow sisters when they actually need it.
When a woman is put on fire, when she is raped, is brutalized, is stripped naked on the streets, forced to quit her studies to marry a man three times her senior in age, when she is blamed if she is raped, or teased, when a woman is beaten repeatedly for refusing to pressurize her parents into paying dowry, when she is considered inferior to her male counterparts, that is when I need to give voice to my anger and lash out at the people responsible for it. If I am a true feminist, I will do the same if it were a man being stoned on the streets, being raped, being accused of a fake rape, being doubted over just because he is a man. As Gloria Steinem rightly said, a feminist is anyone who recognizes the equality and full humanity of women and men.
Not all men do it, but all women suffer through it.
This is serious. Take it seriously.